Ah, Magic. I've had to do the thing for you. I've decreased my daily dose of meds. It's been a couple weeks now on the lower dose, and I am noticing some changes. A bit less patience. Far more ease staying in bed, falling back asleep, ignoring what's going on around me. Wanting to disconnect.
It's not great. But, it's what's best for us both. Staying on a minimum effective dose is vital for me, and being on the lowest possible dose is what's best for you.
I dare say my friends have noticed a change in me. Maybe even your dad. Who knows, maybe even your siblings. BBV has been extra clingy lately. Maybe that's why.
Living with a body/brain that doesn't produce enough of certain chemicals to keep me feeling my best is tough. I'd like to go off meds completely, and maybe some day I'll try. But, the last time I tried to go off was not pretty and not worth it. The difference the meds make is super clear to me. And just like I give my body other things it needs to function well, I will keep giving it these chemicals. It's better for all of us.
But, I also want to do what's best for you, and that means a lower dose right now. When you start solids, I'll probably be able to go back up to a higher dose.
Parents aren't perfect, and we have to make decisions weighing the pros and the cons. We have to do things that aren't easy, and we worry constantly about how it will impact you. I do hope that you won't have any long term side effects from my having taken medications while pregnant, but, if you do, I hope that you can forgive and understand that it was a choice I made, a compromise for the both of us.
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